Psyche & Imagination - Online Abstract
The Art

Melody Weightman

Sixty Minute Smile

I was inspired in making this durational video performance Sixty Minute Smile many years ago I visited the Contemporary Toronto Art Gallery, Canada where I came upon Kelly Marks 33 Minute Stare. This entailed staring into the camera for 33 minutes. I was moved by the subtle power and strength I saw in this performance. Who was she staring at? Is she showing the face behind the mask? It made me think about my self and how I am perceived by others. I thought about how we can project to others in the outside world, but feel significantly different inside.

As a child, I did not smile in front of cameras because I thought that when I smiled my nose looked exceptionally big. Years later I overcame these childlike insecurities, feeling I had grown into my nose. I still find myself at times not smiling in front of the cameras, and am amazed to how that has stayed with me subconsciously throughout my life. In the Sixty Minute Smile I decided to confront these subconscious insecurities arose from childhood. I sat in my living room surrounded by complete silence smiling into the video camera. I observed the change in light trailing across the walls. As time passed, I felt more disconnected from my face and its fixed smile. The smile transcended to something separate from me. I found myself having to make an effort in connecting to my face whilst staring into the camera. My muscles were becoming painful and it became increasingly harder to maintain the smile. There developed an odd numbness and at times I became detached from my face. Struggling with my detachment I needed to concentrate on what it was doing. I saw the light slowly pass over my face, moving as I was not. The experience was trance like in relation to mediation working towards a psychological state which can go beyond the discomfort.

Is this piece a self portrait which looks out to the viewer with a mixture of fluid emotions? Looking back on the piece, I saw it as powerful reflection of myself and what I was going thought during my first year training in Art Psychotherapy. I am sitting with myself, and the child in me that found it hard to smile. I feel raw in this piece. I hope that the viewer sees more than a woman smiling into the camera; that they linger in curiosity as to what is behind the smile. Perhaps smiling for the camera was part of the problem, forcing a smile that was not real.

Melody Weightman (1975) is an inter-displinary artist, currently working in performance art. Educated at Langara College Canada (1995). BA in Art Nova Scotia College of Art and Design Canada 2000. MA student in Art Psychotherapy Goldsmiths (2004 ).